Wednesday

I’m feeling good about writing everything here. It’s not relief. I don’t feel forgiveness or a sense of moving on or anything like that. It’s right though.

The people who have abused me since birth have not deserved the comfort of the lives they’ve lived.

They don’t feel remorse. Trees never once been an apology, or a show of concern for how anything may have, or dci to yes to, affect me.

Nothing. Even as a small child my well being was not discussed.

I remember feeling such deep pain watching other kids being cared for, having activities and things to do out of the blue, attention from their family. That pain was always at home too. My brother was doted over.

Sometimes I would break down and cry so hard.

Of course I don’t understand I was feeling the neglect. I look back in horror and disgust with them. Had my dad not looked the way he does, I honestly believe I would have been removed from that house.

I was an invisible child until it would break me. Or when they had time to tease, scapegoat, or criticize.

Never a kind word. Never a selfless act toward that small child. It was always, ALWAYS, conditional.

That never changed. Not one person in that soulless family has ever taken a moment to consider that the scapegoating, slander, and abuse might harm me. Not a moment of remorse. Not a second of regret for their cruelty.

Writing this confirms to me how much I would love to see justice at least once in my life.

For the abuse, the slander, the toxic exclusion, the scapegoating.

Or for the current abuse from the violent man, his minions actions, the theft, the animal abuse, the destruction, any of the crimes and felonies.

I’ll keep working towards that.

No, I won’t turn the other cheek or just get over it and move on.

The harm to my life, and the many lives of the animals around, is too much.

They’ve almost destroyed me many times. But they are completely worthless as humans. I have an appreciation for the living things around me that people like can’t have. The violent man and his minions, and the people in my ‘family’ that commit these abuses or turn their eyes away from it are missing parts of their soul. They can’t be complete people and excuse their abuse at the same time